2 months of social isolation – A mother emotional’s swing

Wow, the last couple of weeks have been a great success and disaster at the same time! I can’t believe I can have such different perceptions of the same timeframe.

I haven’t been writing or reading at all these days. I was too busy trying to relax (after 20:30) by watching TV, watching woodworking videos, cooking and online shopping (yeah, I do not even want to know how much money I spent exactly!).

I wanted to write a quite negative post some days ago but then I decided to wait and hope for the best..and here I am. My son has been in so much stress and frustration (and we as well). One of the few things I can recall of the last 20 days are the screams, cries, kicking and biting.

As a lot of parents, I also asked myself: what did I do wrong? I believed (and still do from time to time) that there must have been something from my side that triggered such behaviour. What is really annoying is that I am not able to evaluate how much of this attitude is due to the crazy virus-situation and how much is his own character. I found a bit of peace on advices from teacher, family and friends but inside there’s still this weird bitter feeling that I should have done something differently.

Anyway, a bit of interaction with other kids is softening the situation and it looks like this is what my son needed.

Here in Germany the rules are softening, people can now meet and playgrounds are open. Considering the situation I am not a big fan of playground so I try to avoid crowded hours. In terms of ‘keeping the distance’ there’s not much I can say to a 2,5 year old kid. What I am really surprised of is, how hard it looks to have parents keeping the distance! I alway move to an isolated corned and keep at least 1,5 m between myself and others but after 5 minutes here is a someone coming close to me.

Can you imagine that 2 months are gone already? January and February for me where never-ending and then boom, corona came and suddenly we are in May.

As everyone else, we are hoping to have decent holidays this summer, to be able to go back home to Italy and meet relatives and go to to Japan at the end of the year. We had to cancel 2 trips to Italy already and we can’t wait to visit friends and family. We were so much looking forward to these holidays. We haven’t done many vacations on the second part of 2019 and had hard times that we really needed some us-time as a couple. We were planning 2/3 days away and leaving the little thunderstorm to grandma but all plans have been ruined. We are putting all our hopes for July ..even though I am starting feeling a bit pessimistic.

In the meantime, we booked a house with friend at Ostsee hoping that 7 days will give us a bit of air and recharge for June. We also have a plan B which implies staying in Berlin in summer and explore the surroundings by bike. Not the ideal solution, especially for me since I am scared of bikes, but yeah, I guess we do not have many other options.

A bit of a downside from the parenting side but I reached a great success on my hobbies: I managed to finish my balcony project and built a sofa and a smoking table with pallets. It took more than expected but I am proud of myself! I can’t believe I found time here and there to do it.

This woodworking thing is getting quite intense for me. I am curious to see how long it will last.

That’s all from my side for now. Stay healthy and, as usual, leave a message in the comment box.

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